“So why couldn’t you just tell her the truth?” I asked Oche.
“I can’t tell her that I can’t afford to pay for her to have our Baby in the U.S. Can’t
you understand? Her parents can very well pay for the trip. If I don’t do it, they’ll
think their Daughter didn’t marry a worthy man.
‘But you are already neck deep in debt!” I told him.
Oche had been like this since we were at School. It was his life mission to marry
the Daughter of a “big man” His wife’s family didn’t think he was the best fit for
their Daughter. Even though he was from Benue State, they always referred to him
as a “Hausa boy”.
Oche’s wife – Brume was like a peacock .She had her head in the clouds and was
always forming posh, even when it wasn’t necessary. Oche had to fight tooth and
nail to get his bank job. He knew that without money, he would lose his wife. He
paid for a housemaid and cook. He said his wife was a Queen and that housework
added no value to a wife. Somebody else could do that.
I just didn’t understand why a man couldn’t be honest with his own wife. They had
done series of IVF treatments after 4 years of marriage, and Brume kept having
miscarriages. Once Brume was able to get pregnant and keep it so, Oche agreed
with his wife that it made sense not to have the baby on Nigerian soil.
Brume had left for the America. Oche was deeper in debt. It was affecting his
work. He had maxed his loan limit at work and had borrowed money from friends
and loan sharks.
I begged him to sell his Range rover, buy a smaller car and be free from debt. He
said he’d rather die. Things may have gotten out of hand for him because he got
himself involved in a racket with one of the customers of the bank. It backfired. He
I couldn’t say to him “I told you so”. He refused to tell his wife. He told her that
she didn’t need to hurry back and that he would come to visit her and the baby.
His plan was to get to America and not come back. He eventually sold his prized
Range rover, his wife’s car, and other belongings without telling her and went to